I love the German language

While on a run/walk in my neighborhood yesterday, I had the most interesting conversation in German - with myself. I'm so ashamed. I don't come in contact with a lot of German speakers in the Bay Area, and when the opportunity to speak German arises, I end up worrying about my ablilities and the conversation reverts back to English. I spent all of that time learning a language that I now never use, except in conversations with myself. Lame.

Anyhoo - Ich habe den gefolgeten Email von einen Freunden gekriegt, und hoffe ihr findet es auch lustig. (I received the following email from a friend, and hope you also find it funny.)

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will bethe official language of the European Union rather than German, which was theother possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that Englishspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in planthat would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make thesivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k".This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome"ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reachthe stage where! more komplikated changes are possible. Governments willenkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent toakurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in thelanguag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z"and "w" with "v."

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" andafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mortrubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.

Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al bespeking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.